Nightie night
February 2nd, 2008, 4:15 am Hobbies News
And then it caught my eye. It was a nightie with a bunny and some sassy words printed on it. I was suddenly struck with a thought.
Why the slogan? Women the world over are crawling into bed in nighties that have, say, Tweety Bird on them proclaiming %26quot;I tawt I taw a puddy tat%26quot;. Or Garfield, a big red heart and the words %26quot;Lookin for Love%26quot;.
Worst, in my opinion, are the ones that proclaim the absolute awesomeness of the wearer. The fact that there will be damply hungover, greasy haired, flu-laden horrors withstood while wearing such pyjamas is irony beyond anything Alanis could ever comprehend.
Why? Men, especially single men, and advertisers are under the impression that women slide between the sheets every night in lovely silky and lacy numbers when, really, ladies generally wear an old Kiss T-shirt and a scuzzy pair of jammies with monkeys on them or, especially in this weather, just a pair of undies (and not a bom-chicka-wow-wow pair of undies, a comfy pair of undies that could be used to cover furniture).
But whats with the bizarre words? Women with the most self-respect, the great jobs, the lovely boyfriends or tolerable husbands will go to bed wearing jammies bearing the most ridiculous slogans or worse, poodles. Or penguins. Or scary flowers. I myself have a giant grey nightie with glittery letters on it implying that Im pretty much up for it. Why oh why etc.
And to all you women scoffing at me who wear lovely Elle McPherson slips with lacy bits, we all know youre kidding yourself. Unless you sleep like a corpse you are fully aware that you wake up three times a night with your nightie around your armpits, lace itching you, and, if its hot, sweat sticking it to your back. While the rest of us sleep well in our Kiss T-shirts and save ourselves thousands in concealer.
Baaaah.
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